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January 01, 2012 - Sunday - 11:04 a.m.

It's been a couple months again. Can't seem to keep focused. We had a shut down at work from Christmas to New Years. We go back to work on Tuesday. Two more days of vacation.

Yesterday was my fourth wedding anniversary. Can't believe it has been four years already, and yet I can't imagine Scott not being there. We went our for Sushi last night and then just spent a quiet evening at home playing on the computer. It was really a nice evening.

Scott is watching Star Wars this morning. We hooked up the surround sound that Scott got for Christmas. It sounds amazing. He is very happy with it.

I wonder what this new year will bring. I turn fifty two this year. Fifty Two?!? Oh man, the years are going by far too fast now. I still have a millions things I wanted to do. It's getting down to a point where I am going to have to pick a few and focus on them.

I have been at my job now for almost 25 years! Twenty Five Years?!? Why did I never go looking for something else? I suppose because I enjoyed the work I was doing and the people that I worked with. So many of them are gone now. Moved on to new jobs or got laid off and have moved on to new jobs by default. Almost every one I hung out with are gone now. My department will be down to four people by the end of January, and only two of us worker bees. If it weren't for Didi being there I don't know who I'd hang out with.

So much of the work here in Colorado Springs has gone away. If I were working at head quarters in San Jose I might have a better chance of having a job in a year or so. We are just counting the weeks now. Any day they could decide that they can do our jobs somewhere else. I very much need to have another job before that happens. I can't afford to go without a job. Everything depends upon my income.

I got my first call from a head hunter about a week before the Christmas break. You know, the kind were the company looking for someone pays?! This is what I have hoped for. It is for another company here in Colorado Springs, which would mean that I don't have to move. That would be good. I'd hate to move away from my family, but sometimes I wonder if that is for the best.

I tend to resist the thought of moving away from my family. I can't imagine not seeing them all the time. Scott has said so often how he'd like to live in Washington State. The only bad part of that thought is being away from my family, other then that I think I would really enjoy Washington.

Perhaps it is time to let go and quit trying to figure out what I should do, but just start looking and see what comes up. Instead of just thinking I don't want to live there or there or there. Is it the best thing for me to stay here? I don't know.

Perhaps this year I will try to be more open to the possibilities out there. I think it is time to start looking seriously.

Last year was a good year. I got a new grandson and Scott made some accomplishments in the SCA that he had hoped for, for a long time. He made Warlord of the Barony and the Kingdom and got his Stag's Blood. And we had fun! We did a few events that were so enjoyable.

I worked at writing this year, but didn't finish anything. I am definitely working in a good directions, perhaps this year will show more success.

I am looking forward to a good year.

M.