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January 07, 2004 - Wednesday, 11:59 p.m.

::sighs:: Money, or the lack thereof, I hate thinking about it. This has been a long day. A little depressing as well. Bill day is always bad. But I've gone through the pile and seen the damage. Gah! Let's not think about that any more.

I'm trying to get ready for my trip. I've washed clothes, etc... It's late and I should go to sleep... but I can't. I should just be excited about my trip, but right now I am struggling with being depressed. ::sighs:: I am sure it's finances and all the things I think I should get done that I'm not going to get done before I leave. Once I am checked in at the airport it'll be better.

I've been in a funny place for a couple days. Not sure what it is. It's like there is this huge weight upon my shoulders and the feeling that there is nothing I can do about it, but carry it or collapse... and collapsing isn't an option... it's left me pondering and pondering. It seems I am in bad mood... not that many would notice as I mostly keep it to myself. But I feel it. I am more easily irritated by anything and anyone. I'm feeling overwhelmed far too often. Ugh!

I must sleep... time enough to figure things out later...

M.