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November 03, 2005 - Thursday, 7:09 a.m.

Restlessness, sleeplessness, and the wind...

It was some time after 5 am, and I lay in bed listening to the wind blow and the chimes ringing outside my window. Why? Some time after 1 am I turned off the TV. I purposefully DIDN�T check the time, I knew I was going to have to get up at 6 am, and I didn�t what to think about how much sleep I wasn�t going to get. I�d laid restlessly in bed for a long time after I turned off the TV, getting up on and off all night either to get something to drink or going to the bathroom. I thought about the wind, it had to be a storm front coming in. It had been 60 degrees most of the night, it seemed too warm as I lay in bed. Perhaps it is going to snow, some thing�s coming. ::sighs:: Why am I struggling with sleep so much. I don�t understand. It�s Thursday. I think it�s been well after 1 am every night this week before I�ve been able to fall asleep, and I�ve been up by 6 am all week, no naps, I should have been exhausted by last night.

I can�t believe it is 6:35 am, I�m completely dressed and ready for work. The wind is blowing like crazy, the chime constantly making noise. It�s still 60 degrees outside. I�ve been taking L to work and G to school this week. Their car isn�t working, something with the battery or alternator. I pick them up at about 7:20 am. Monday is when the car crapped out on them. I was on my way to work, when I got a phone call asking for a jump. I went by, jumped their car and headed to work. I�d been at work about 20 minutes when I got another call. They�d dropped off G at school and the car had just stopped running as they were going through down town taking L to work. I got in my car and went and got L. We jumped the car again, so T could take it home and I took L on to work, then back to work myself. The car stalled again after that and T walked home, leaving it parked somewhere in between the last jump and home.

Philip helped them get the car home later Monday night and he�s been picking up G after school (which he does every day) and L from work. What a good son. :o)

The wind is crazy. I can�t seem to find a storm forecast, but this is such a typical pattern for a good sized snow storm to follow this warm weather of the last few days. I don�t understand why it isn�t in the forecast.

Still� another half hour until I go get L and G. Stormy was meowing strangely this morning. He was chasing some bug around and had it cornered by my bedroom door, when it disappeared, either into a crack or it wandered off while he wasn�t paying attention. I think the wind has him freaked out as well. Hmmm� I guess he�s wandered off again, in search of another bug I am sure.

The house is quiet. Everyone is asleep. I just woke up Philip to get him to help me put my necklace on. He�ll go back to sleep for a while now. I think I need to be sure to talk to the doctor about my trouble sleeping, which is linked to the restlessness, and most likely to the underlying depression. Or at least that is MY conjecture. I have GOT to get myself back into the gym. I�ve let so much time slip by already. Well over a month. I am sure it would help me sleep.

Need to head out of here.

Later�. M.

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