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September 14, 2005 - Wednesday, 12:14 p.m.

I hate Layoffs...

It’s awful to work in an industry and for a company that seems to view layoffs as a quarterly cost savings measure. It takes a toll on the people that are left behind and impacts morale tremendously. It’s another Layoff Wednesday here. My company’s favorite layoff day as all the multiple shifts converge on this day. All 5 shifts are here some time during this day. Our particular small group didn’t get hit, as we just lost a tech to a position in another spot in the company, thank goodness!! However, there are a couple people here and there, a number of them I know. Makes for a very dark day.

It’s been far too long since I last wrote. Last week passed in anticipation of today’s events. I went for a hike in Garden of the Gods on Wednesday. I’ve lived here for over 30 years and I’d never actually hiked there. It was really a nice walk. I’ll have to do that again.

Thursday night we did a “Sisters Night”. The four of us met for dinner and then sat at Barnes and Noble and played Scrabble. It was really a nice evening. I so very much enjoy my sister’s company. Char was worried about some events at work and we discussed that a lot. Seeing as she’d mentioned that she probably wouldn’t be able to sleep when she went home I suggested she join me at the Jam for a bit before she went home.

We arrived there at about 10:30 pm. Phil had finished his set, but showed up to talk to us shortly after we sat down. He wandered around some, but tended to gravitate back to us. He stood and visited with Char and I, and then left about 11:30 after shaking Char’s hand and saying good night. He also reminded me that he’d see me on Friday. We decided earlier in the week to go to a movie on Friday night.

Char and I headed out shortly after Phil left. Now, as we headed for the exit, a guy that was sitting at the next table stopped me. He said, “I have two words for you. Nice cans.” I smiled somewhat confused and thanked him. We then continued out. Now, until about an hour ago I had no idea what this guy was saying to me. I have to say I had an idea as to what it meant, but had never heard it before so it was a guess. I finally asked L this morning what it meant. She wouldn’t tell me what it meant until I told here WHERE I heard it. I explained it and she found this to be very ‘cute’ and spent a lot of time chuckling. I have to say I am sufficiently embarrassed. She said, “You are so cute!” I guess to be 45 years old and to have NEVER heard this expression before is… perhaps amazing… and at the very least ‘cute’. Even I have to smile… well through the embarrassment… It took me over a week to ask her what it meant. :o)

Friday night we met down town to see the movie “The Constant Gardener”. It was a dutch treat. I have to tell you that this movie, though very good, was terribly depressing. Phil arrived already in a pretty depressed mood. He was worried about the layoffs slated for the following week, and had really had a pretty bad day. Walking out of the theatre was pretty oppressive. Phil walked me to my car a couple blocks away. As we got to the first corner and stood their waiting for the light I said, “Well… THAT was depressing.” He commented that was pretty much what the lady behind us had to say the minute the credits began to roll. We visited at the car for a couple minutes, and I finally said. “Well, you need a hug and I’m going to give you one.” His response was “I’m okay.” I ignored it and gave him a hug. I drove away feeling very worried about him.

It was a bad night for sleeping. I lay in bed and finished reading the book ‘Dragonquest’. The second book in the series that Phil loaned me. Somewhere in the middle of the night, the two years of having my VERY big kids flop on my bed every time they wanted to talk to me took its toll. We had to take the mattress and box spring off the bed, removed the broken supports and put a metal bed frame in to support my bed. My son was up at like 2 am helping me. I didn’t finish the book until about 5 am and then was up at 8 and into work by 9. I needed to do a couple hours of work to hit my 40 hours for last week. I called Phil about noon, still worried about him. The minute he answered the phone I knew he was doing 100% better then he had been the night before. We visited for a while and I suggested a walk in Garden of the Gods, which he declined. I wasn’t too bummed, as I was truly exhausted and a nap was first and foremost on my agenda. Fixing the bed in the middle of the night had stirred up a lot of dust and I was fighting an allergic reaction to it. I took a couple benedryl with the thought that I’d lay down, when D called me and asked if I wanted to meet her for lunch.

We met at Panera’s and visited for about an hour. She’d had a wonderful time the evening before with S. I am so happy for her. She definitely deserves it. She and I had our surgery about a month apart two years ago, so have talked since that time quite often. It is really enjoyable to be developing an actual friendship with her. She is a very sweet woman.

By about 2 pm the benedryl was working very well. I got home, crawled into bed and slept until 7 pm!!!?! The rest of the weekend passed quietly, nothing exciting, just a nice weekend.

This week has been pretty quiet. Everyone has been quietly thinking about today coming up. Phil wrote me a lot of email on Monday, which was really nice. Yesterday, I dropped off the book I finished over the weekend and we visited for a short amount of time at his desk. Layoffs are pretty much over for today. We are still here.

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