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July 13, 2005 - Wednesday, 10:14 p.m.

Sleepless and restless...

Not sleeping well lately. It was dark when I woke up this morning. I found my phone and flipped it openÖ 3:39 am. I laid down and tried to drift back to sleep. Youíd have thought I would just fall back asleep, but it didnít happen. Instead my mind just raced. I was wide awake, thinking about life, thinking about the days ahead, and thinking about Phil. By 5 am I simply got up, checked my email and started getting ready for work.

I walked into the building at work and badged in at 6:30 am. I started right back into the project I was working on when I left yesterday afternoon. It took up most of my day. It was like working on mazes all day long. At noon I walked outside and read some more of ďAngels & DemonsĒ. Could have sat out there all afternoon, but I didnít. It was back to the mazes. I got the thing completely routed AND the plating traces done. Thatís basically a done design. GAH! My brain feels about cooked.

I am trying to do something constructive with my worries about my finances. So I am starting to apply for jobs. I am trying to look at local companies. I think it would be good to do at least one a day for a while.

Itís far too hot tonightÖ itís still in the upper 80ís. The house is so warm. I have the ceiling fan going in my room and it helps a little, but not enough. I see that Hurricane Emily is headed for the Yucatan Peninsula. I got another email from Phil this afternoon. Thatís the third one in three days!! It was great!! I was really happy to receive another email. Itís nice to know he is thinking about me, as we know I am thinking about him. He is watching the storm reports and may end up having to stay a couple extra days if Emily hits where he is before his flight takes off. Iíll be watching its progress for sure.

LaterÖ

Itís cooling offÖ Iím tired and I have a headache. The crickets are chirping, and I can hear the highway noises and the buzz of the ceiling fan is pretty quiet, but kind of makes a white noise. The house is quiet. Everyone is either asleep or gone. I didnít go to the gym tonight. I think I need to go directly from work. I need to round my things up and figure out how I want to do that. Not going to turn on the TV tonight. Just going to listen to the quiet sounds and try to get some good sleep.

Today is Maureenís 44th birthday. Sheís in Hawaii with Char and her two kids. Maureenís wish of a life time was to go to Hawaii, and there she is. What an awesome thing for Char to do for her.

Gonna go say my prayers and crawl into bed.

Sweet dreams. M.

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